Tuesday, September 18, 2012

5 Tips to Better Listening

With all of the things on our to-do lists, it is often difficult to change course when a child needs to talk about something.  From who do what in math class to the new movie coming out this summer, kids have lots of things that they are eager to disclose, but are we parents listening?

Husbands and wives want to be understood by each other but often feel misunderstood, feelings are hurt, and resentments grow.

Any of this sound familiar?  If so, here are some tips to improve your "listening."

1. Physically focus on the person talking with you.  Make sure your eyes stay trained on the person's eyes and face.

2. Intentionally listen for the feeling that the person is trying to express.  Is it excitement?  Frustration?  Concern?  Joy?

3. Restate the feeling you believe the person is expressing and the reason you believe they are expressing it.  For instance, "You sound really excited that the Avenger's movie is just a couple of weeks away."  This validates the person and opens them up to wanting to share more.

4. Ask for clarification if necessary.  Then, repeat #3.

5. Stop whatever you are doing, take your focus off of your to-do list, and be present.  If you cannot stop what you are doing at the moment, ask the person to come back in a certain period of time, when you will be able to focus appropriately.  Your relationships will thank you!

If you need some help on learning skills to make your relationships better, or marriage-advice, click on over to the Marriage Guy and Gal website, we would be happy to help you gain the tools you need to improve your relationships! www.marriageguyandgal.com


  1. I so needed to hear this.. Like God talking to my soul! Thank you guys!